Bareerah Zafar on loving yourself — all of yourself
by Bareerah Zafar
The most dreadful part of my morning is when I stand, somber, in front of my bathroom mirror, not quite making eye contact with my reflection.
I almost never like what I see: The reflection that stares at me longing to be loved and appreciated while I come up with countless way to change it.
I poke and grab at the fat on my stomach, I slap the flab on my arms, I trace the scars on my face left behind by my acne.
I hate this, I hate this, I hate this.
Many of us often find ourselves scrutinizing every part of our appearances like this. Why do we want to alter this body that has been so good to us?
We want to get rid of fat; gain fat; gain muscle; be skinnier; be thicker; get bigger lips; bigger hips; smaller waists.
This is not enough. It’ll never be enough. I’m not enough.
I hate this, I hate this, I hate this!
Stop ... breathe ...
Why are we constantly tearing ourselves down because of what we look like?
Why do we spend so much money trying to alter our bodies with surgeries, weight loss teas and skin bleaching creams? We know that once we “fix” one part of ourselves, we’ll find something else that we don’t like.
Why can’t we realize that we are beautiful and worthy and enough just the way we are?
In our capitalist society that thrives on the consumption of ridiculous products, no one but the elite benefits. We are constantly exposed to advertisements from big corporations and their celebrity spokespeople telling us that we are not good enough, that we need to change something about ourselves in order to be worthy. They profit off our insecurities.
They don’t want us to realize that our bodies give our loved ones someone to hold. Our bodies give those younger than us someone to look up to. Our bodies give warmth and shelter and hope and love to all those around us.
When we give so much of ourselves to others, we deserve to love our bodies.
Our bodies are perfect in every way. We may be missing some part, other parts may not work, our tummies may spill over our jeans, we may have stretch marks, we may have body hair ... so what?
These traits don’t make us any less beautiful.
I struggle to love my body, just like so many others do. It is incredibly hard to unlearn societal standards when we are constantly exposed to them. But we need to realize that the more we doubt ourselves, the more big corporations profit; the more they promote impossible beauty standards; the more people learn to hate their bodies. If we neglect to love the bodies we have, we are allowing the continuance of this cycle of negativity.
But the more we love ourselves, the more positivity we project onto our communities.
So love yourself. Your tummy, your thighs, your stretch marks, your skin, your scars, your body hair, your mind, your capabilities, your inabilities. Love all of yourself.
Bareerah Zafar ([email protected]) is a student at the University of Oregon and writes a monthly column for The Register-Guard.
I almost never like what I see: The reflection that stares at me longing to be loved and appreciated while I come up with countless way to change it.
I poke and grab at the fat on my stomach, I slap the flab on my arms, I trace the scars on my face left behind by my acne.
I hate this, I hate this, I hate this.
Many of us often find ourselves scrutinizing every part of our appearances like this. Why do we want to alter this body that has been so good to us?
We want to get rid of fat; gain fat; gain muscle; be skinnier; be thicker; get bigger lips; bigger hips; smaller waists.
This is not enough. It’ll never be enough. I’m not enough.
I hate this, I hate this, I hate this!
Stop ... breathe ...
Why are we constantly tearing ourselves down because of what we look like?
Why do we spend so much money trying to alter our bodies with surgeries, weight loss teas and skin bleaching creams? We know that once we “fix” one part of ourselves, we’ll find something else that we don’t like.
Why can’t we realize that we are beautiful and worthy and enough just the way we are?
In our capitalist society that thrives on the consumption of ridiculous products, no one but the elite benefits. We are constantly exposed to advertisements from big corporations and their celebrity spokespeople telling us that we are not good enough, that we need to change something about ourselves in order to be worthy. They profit off our insecurities.
They don’t want us to realize that our bodies give our loved ones someone to hold. Our bodies give those younger than us someone to look up to. Our bodies give warmth and shelter and hope and love to all those around us.
When we give so much of ourselves to others, we deserve to love our bodies.
Our bodies are perfect in every way. We may be missing some part, other parts may not work, our tummies may spill over our jeans, we may have stretch marks, we may have body hair ... so what?
These traits don’t make us any less beautiful.
I struggle to love my body, just like so many others do. It is incredibly hard to unlearn societal standards when we are constantly exposed to them. But we need to realize that the more we doubt ourselves, the more big corporations profit; the more they promote impossible beauty standards; the more people learn to hate their bodies. If we neglect to love the bodies we have, we are allowing the continuance of this cycle of negativity.
But the more we love ourselves, the more positivity we project onto our communities.
So love yourself. Your tummy, your thighs, your stretch marks, your skin, your scars, your body hair, your mind, your capabilities, your inabilities. Love all of yourself.
Bareerah Zafar ([email protected]) is a student at the University of Oregon and writes a monthly column for The Register-Guard.